Men’s Notes Relating to Sex

Men’s Notes Relating to Sex

Here are a selection of lecture excerpts about sexuality and sex in relation to Men, From the book Ancient Art of Self Healing which is a collection of excerpts from lectures, notes and classes by SSS Harbhajan Singh Khalsa (Yogi Bhajan) 


There are 20,000 years of research into the subject of Humanalogy, and that is why the Scriptures advise men that they should never be harsh with a woman.  He should never threaten her security, and he should not put her down socially, because the moment a man puts a woman down socially she will become emotionally insecure and she will get him.  Also man should not criticize woman’s motherly nature — "you are not a good mother."  It is like taking potassium cyanide through an enema, it is that dangerous.  Rather, if you want to hook a friendship with her, just start loving her child; you’ll have her 2 times more than you think.  To insult the motherhood in.  A woman is just asking the cobra to sting you through the forehead.


The men who masturbate do not realize the physical difference between ejaculations.  The difference is that ejaculation through masturbation pressurizes the gray matter.  It is heavy on the brain.  It creates more problems than any sexual activity.  To be very frank with you, homosexual interplay is better than masturbation.

Masturbation causes a triple action on the pituitary gland which takes away your power to concentrate.  Running is a good substitute for masturbation.

In masturbation the glandular system is over-pressurized.  The nervous system is drained to death.  It is a forced situation.  But in intercourse, it is normal.  In one masturbation, the pressure on your body is more than you can ever consider handling.  But even when you ejaculate one time after the other in intercourse, there’s no pressure on the nervous system, and so that makes a lot of difference.  In intercourse the woman’s energy is there, and that’s what intercourse is.

In masturbation, the woman’s energy is right there (in your mind), but you are doing it to yourself.  It means you are forcing your system to go into a space where there is no orderliness.  It is a solo, and it is a very painful solo.  It’s not very normal.

Sometimes the atmosphere and the weather itself can trigger masturbation.  You become sensual, sexual, you cannot find a partner and you end up masturbating.  Fortunately, for women there is no such thing as masturbation so she has nothing to worry about (see Women’s chapter), but for men it is really a problem.


The most detrimental thing which can happen to you is when you indulge in a sexual relationship after you have eaten.  After eating food, this heavy exercise in which you involve all your nerves, all your muscles, and all your mind, can ruin your stomach.  If you do not listen to that warning and keep on doing it, ultimately you will end up having a quick discharge, a premature ejaculation.  Pre-ejaculative people are what we call bananas.  That is where the phrase "banana men" came from.  Some people are so fast that they can’t even enter the woman before discharge.  These are the people who have not given themselves a gap between their eating and their sexual desires, and that is why they develop this nonsense.


The tragedy of our life comes from the male.  There are many, many males who when they feel horny and sexual, and the woman doesn’t respond, get angry and find different ways to show her how idiotic they are.  Every woman knows it.  She knows how idiotic you are.  Normally, in a normalcy, certain things you must do: let the woman invoke the incentive of sensual wavelength, and let it mature.  And, if you decide to sleep on two different beds, never go to the bed of the woman you love the most.  Let her come to you.

Any man who is sexually weak before his woman is a nuisance to himself.  Don’t forget either, that the sexual relationship, or what you call physical intercourse, is the practical end of one invoked incentive in relationship. It’s a cycle.

Horniness on the physical level is intercourse, but on a higher level it is creativity.  An artists feel horny many, many times.  Many times they feel very stiff in their male organs and then the stiffness is gone and they can’t sit still.  They go out and paint a painting.  In a couple of hours something comes out which they paint, that their forefathers can’t paint like that.  So, it is the same, you must understand, it is the same energy.  Use it this way, use it that way, use it up, use it down, it is the same energy. – Also see "Sat Kriya"


Unfortunately there are men who are just animals transferred immediately into the body of a man.  The majority of the humans come from the animal nature and sometimes, after death, the transformation from animal to the human body takes such a short: interval that the animal nature can be seen and experienced through these people.  Normally, the animal nature is more prevalent among men than among women because man is the first incarnation.  It is very rare that in the transformation an animal will become a female, Therefore, you can deal with some men and right under their skin you’ll find a snake, a parrot, a duck, a swan, a deer, a horse, an idiot.  Just try to look under, the skin and you can exactly, by characteristics, compare the notes and find what it is.


Garlic gives sexual energy which can be channeled into creativity.

If a person is not obnoxiously offended by garlic smell when he is socially entertaining, he is a man with a very high standard.  Any man who is married, and who wants to remain married, and thinks it is a privilege to be married, should somehow eat 2 cloves of garlic daily.  You can take it in a capsule or any other way; that doesn’t matter, it is what is required of the system.  This bad smell or odd smell, whatever you want to call the garlic smell, is very, very good for your insides because it counteracts the inside smells.

For those people versed in Kundalini Yoga, there is a good exercise to do a few hours after eating several cloves of garlic: Bring the legs to a 60 degree angle.  Apply neck lock and do breath of fire for 1 1/2 to 3 minutes, then inhale, exhale and apply Mulbhand.  Repeat. –  Also see "Sat Kriya"


There are 2 kinds of ejaculations: one in the sex organs and one in the mind. There are several forms of Ejaculations in the mind.  Have you heard sometime of somebody who had a dream in which he had intercourse and had done a great thing?  He was thinking, he has had a wet dream.  He gets up and it is not real.  Do you know that experience?  Then there is an experience in meditation… you feel exactly as if you were ejaculating with that girl you love the most, and the whole thing is just a "feeling" you get when you are meditating.  That feeling is at the third eye, exactly that feeling.  And there is a third form in which you feel from the spine.

Something going up, rising like the mercury in a thermometer.  It is a sensation like an electrical current going up your spine.  It goes up, and then at the third eye you feel something going around, and around, and around, and then comes down like a rain.

Let us complete the picture.  When you are having physical intercourse, and the love game is perfectly divine, she totally merges in you, and she is totally supportive of you, and she is playing the game, and you are ejaculating, and 2 ejaculations are happening.  One will be in the lower area of your male organ, and the other will be in your head.  If ever that should happen to you, one symptom and sign of it is that you will be aware of what is happening in the universe and universes beyond, but you won’t move physically.  This can only happen if the woman is perfectly into her entanglement with y ou, is 100% supportive, 100% projective, 100% cooperating, and 100% your mate.  You are mating with your mate, and the meeting is very, very, very, very meditative.


For men to retain their sexuality for a longer time, yogic science advises that during urination they stop the flow of urine 5 or more times to build those muscles. (This also helps prevent kidney stones)


When you are tired, one thing as a man you must declare, "I am tired.  And I need a truce."  A man who is shy to declare he is tired is asking for trouble.  "Come, trouble, come," that is the mantra.  It is ridiculous if you are tired, and you need rest.  If you need rest and you are not getting rest, you are going to rust.  You can get a lot of sympathy, a lot of feeling from the other side if you say, "I am very tired, I need rest and you will be a help to let me rest."  What we are saying is that some people become very sensual and sexual when they are tired, and they do intercourse.  That is very sickening because that causes a lot of serious diseases, even blood diseases, which come only when you are tired and indulge in sex and don’t take a rest.


Some of these do’s and don’ts are MEN – explained in the scriptures.  It is written that you must not have relations with a woman if you have eaten within the time range of 2 or 3 hours.  If you have food in your stomach, if you have eaten, the game of love is out.  Game of food is in.

Food is in, love is out.  Remember this, otherwise, you will invite many diseases.  On the other hand, it is also very undesirable to indulge into a sexual relationship when you are very ‘hungry, or when you are under the pressure of time.  In the Western world it is called "quick meal", which is nothing but a nerve exploitation.

There are two things you must not do.  You must not meditate when you have eaten, and you must not have sexual relationships when you have eaten.

Otherwise, it will not make a saint out of you, but a piglet.  It’s a very damaging thing.  If you meditate with a full stomach, all of the blood, instead of going to the stomach to take care of the whole system, starts going through the serum to the brain.  You are then causing an unnecessary problem.  Simply, when you have taken food, everything should concentrate towards the stomach.

If you are ejaculating downstairs, you are just creating a problem. For a good sexual relationship, you must eat only light food after 4:00 pm

21 Responses to “Men’s Notes Relating to Sex”

  1. Paul Chatcliffe says:

    I have done extensive research into the Sikh Scriptures and nowhere have I seen anything remotely resembling the advice that is offered in the article above. Please do provide a reference (page numbers) of which "scriptures" the author is speaking of:

    "Some of these do’s and don’ts are MEN – explained in the scriptures"



    • Paul, Just because we are Sikhs doesn’t mean that every piece of information comes from the teachings of the Sikh. Also, generally a Sikh won’t call the Siri Guru Granth Sahib “scriptures” and are not referred to in that way since it is the living Guru for Sikhs.

      I don’t know which scriptures are being referred to in that one part but I don’t think they are from the Siri Guru Granth Sahib. It is probably teachings from older times in India. India has a very rich and old history full of wisdom.

  2. Balbir says:

    Is masturbastion against sikhism? And if a person used to do it how can they redeem themselfs by that action? What will they have to do to be forgiven by god?

    • Balbir Singh, God is you…you are God. There is no need for “forgiveness” (especially from some outside “God”). It is natural for men to feel sexual feelings and is something that we must all learn how to deal with. There are lots of things that you can do to help, but one Yoga Kriya I can suggest is Sat Kriya. Practice this every day for at least 3 minutes and it will help move your sexual energy from your lower chakras to your higher centers. Sexual energy is just a creative energy. You can use this energy to create life and you can also use it to create a masterpiece!

      • navi says:

        ok gurumastak thats wrong and you even shoulde't talking abt this at all because you allready have a wife you are not thinking about your kids at alll while saying these thigs to people and tell herijot that i said hi -k- i will be waiting for you reply on my e-mail and i can't belive that you are talkin about sex with people that you have your own wife and i see your comments on every thing that i open but this time on sex you talked about i can not belive that you know that write and reply me on my e-mail as soon as you get this mess and tell herijot that i love him -k-

  3. Pali says:

    Hi Gurumastuk,

    Im very thankful to you for putting this and other valuable infomation up. However personally I feel it may harm some people. Although it is all very good infomation to know, I find myself, having ‘too’ much knowledge and knowing such about myself and woman also, feeling not guilty about sex or love making, but rather i just dont want too because not of the effects it can have on the person, but perhaps its just me not being able to commit or able to sacrifice to a woman. We have been told to give all to god and guru, then making love is fine with me, but i find, reading such books like Osho, which says one must remain patient in order for the woman to come to him.

    Perhaps i have looked too deeply into this matter, but i feel all this infomation really confuses me about what i should express, feel, show, and perhaps other people, maybe even younger than me, may find it difficult or confusing.

    I do love your posts, its very important to know, but on the other hand, are some people ready, or is it making people afraid of sex/love, phobia’s…

    Personally i do practive yoga, and try my sat kirya and surdarshan chakra kirya when i can, but knowing that the majority of the woman are not as they seem, we have to been on our toes…its all very confusing.

    I apologise if i have not made it very clear what i am trying to say, but hope maybe an explanation beyond ‘be yourself’ may follow.

    Keep up the posting!

  4. Gurdev Kaur says:

    Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh

    Sat Nam. Enjoy your recent posts regarding “real issues” that are too often brushed under the carpet in both eastern and western communities. Yogi Ji thankfully wasnt afraid to say what needed to be said :-)

    In regards to those who are confused or in disagreement with the post. I think its really relating to a matter of consumption. Sex often provokes shock in certain people who feel uncomfortable or maybe too comfortable with, but ultimately it IS a question of consumption and energy use. There are lines in the Siri Guru Granth Sahib regarding greed and sexual desire, almost a comparison to them, as they are both about over consumption. I too am not sure if this particular information relates to the Siri guru Granth Sahib, possibly Hindu scriptures too as Yogi Ji was very well educated in various scared texts.

    Siri Dasam Granth Sahib, another Sikh sacred text, does refer to a lot of sexual experiences and advice, so could even be from there??

  5. Pali says:

    Another quick querry,

    Yogi Ji said that we are going into the infomation age, there will be a huge amount of infomation available, and we are not going to be able to handle it…and this said, perhaps all this is too much infomation for the whole sangat? perhaps it should remain in the books written by yogi ji or 3ho groups? The people intrested in this can easily buy the books.


  6. harsimranjeet Singh says:

    Where can I buy this book ancient art of self healing by yogiji?

  7. singh says:

    this is written Re Garlic: “This bad smell or odd smell, whatever you want to call the garlic smell, is very, very good for your insides because it counteracts the inside smells.”

    Could you please elaborate on what this means?

    Also, have you heard of karezza? What do you think of it? i have found some interesting methods for dealing with kaam from this website. Here’s one:

    breathe in and imagine the energy moving up from the lower chakra up along the backside of teh spine to the head. Breathe out and imagine the energy moving down the front to the naval chakra, filling it up with energy. Keep this up until all the excessive energy from the lower chakra is removed.

  8. harsimranjeet says:

    Gurmustuk Singh Ji,

    i really enjoy the pieces from the book you have been posting, please continue to share such gems with us.



  9. Harjinder Singh says:

    Gurumustuk Singh ji very interesting read indeed,thankyou,good info.Please find out(beanti hai) if any how this book full of gems can be reprinted; love to have a copy,im sure many more would.Thankyou again,keep up the good work,enjoy very much your reads(posts).
    Harjinder Singh

  10. k kaur says:

    Where can one find the section “Women’s Chapter”? Would it be possible to post it?

    To be honest, some of the early references to women made me feel a bit distressed, just felt as though the way I took the words being said, that women were being put down/placed lower than men. Just an initial feeling I got. Very possible I could have taken it wrongly, as if these posts are transcribed from lecutres, I could see a difficulty arising in effectively getting the point across to the reader. But would be very interested to read the Women’s Chapter.

    Thank you.

    • Actually, I think it would be the other way around. He spent a lot more time trying to boost up women. His philosophy was that when women are weak, generations fall. But when women are strong then the world flourishes. Every year there used to be a 8 week “Khalsa Women’s Training Camp”. You can see a picture here. There are volumes of books with the Women’s camp lectures and a lot taught in relation to women, families, children, etc.

      There are also some new books/dvds that I think were just produced specifically for women. You can see details at:

  11. Jagbir Kaur says:

    All this stuff is not proven by science. Its all just people’s opinions. Sikhism has nothing to with all this stuff. I personally don’t believe in any of it. We need to understand why certain things are a certain way, not just follow them blindly.

  12. amritpal singh says:


    these teachings of yogi ji mentioned in this article are also in his book for men….i cant rememebr the exact name of the book, but its a manul for men…its a very good book which i got hold of last year and enjoyed reading……especially since i will be getting married later this year……the book has alot of advice on relationships between man and woman.


  13. Mandeep Singh says:

    Waheguru ji ka khalsa, waheguru ji ki fateh…

    ek nimani jhi koshish kar reha.. yogi ji di mein us din preavachan sun reha sii jide vich una ne ek line boli si jo meinu yad ayii…

    ” sex is divine power given to you to generate a GOD…”

    ek hor gal jo guru mahraj di kirpa nall realise hui haii… ki koi v vikaar kadi v havi hove ohh baht taaktwar ne asi una na ladnaa.. par asi us joge nai ki una da mukabla kar sakiaa.. fir andi hai kirpa guru mahrajj dii… bus mahraj age rovoo bentia karoo.. kade ta sade man cho sachi ardass jaegii…je ardass sachi huii te sada man saff hoeya …guru mahraj di kirpa pakki haii..ohh bht dayavaan ne je ohh mera varge paapi di madad kar sakde ne te tusi ta mera nalo kai guna change hooo….

    Guru Rakhaa

  14. jagpreet Kaur says:

    I have an request, if it is possible can you post the “womens chapter” by Harbhajan Singh ji.
    “Fortunately, for women there is no such thing as masturbation so she has nothing to worry about” I want to know more about this topic.

    thank you

  15. J Singh says:

    Vaheguru Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguru Ji Ki Fateh,

    I thank Vaheguru ji for blessing you for doing this website. I have never left a comment before but the site is a huge realistic resource for the issues we face today which never addressed will only manifest and cause more chaos.

    This article especially masturbation has been a huge burden shifter and informative on the side effects which are ever so real. They side effects are real almost to teh exact words in the article – I know as I suffer them due to being unable to stop myself engaging in that activity and have been stuck in this guilt ridden addiction unfortunatley for pretty much all my life since adolescence alomst 20 years it is a sad and horrible cycle which I cannot begin to describe the guilt, depression and state of sin etc etc it causes yet I cant get myself out of it hugely as I am not disciplined. Even sadhana or simran I feel guilty so dont do it much as I feel unworthy might sound silly but it is a intense guilt feeling of worthlessness.

    However I tried the Sat Kriya it does work, but like perhaps any other addiction I cant get myself out of the stupid situation I am in. Cant really go into detail as even what I am telling knows feels explicit. Even sadhana or simran I feel guilty so dont do that as I feel unworthy

    I have often tried seeking help but never really known where to go or how to address the issue I am hoping to get a copy of the book and seek to get help. Any other advise will also be very appreciated as I wish to get out of this cycle I am in.

    Thankyou. May vaheguru bless you more and more to keep up the good work you are doing.