My Life and Family on This Blog

Well, I just read through some of the comments from the pictures/videos I posted a few days ago and can see that some of you were pretty busy! You would think this was a discussion forum!

I have to say I did feel a little vulnerable when I read some of the critical comments. It made me feel like I really have to be careful what I post on the blog, otherwise I am going to get this or that critical remark. For me posting to the blog is VERY personal. I really am putting my life out there on the net. And as you can see it is open game for criticism. It’s ok though, I take it with a grain of salt, but it makes me realize how differently people think.

You have to realize that myself or any of my family are not “perfect Sikhs” (if there is such a think). Just because I started SikhNet does not make me a Super Sikh. I am not trying to portray myself like this, and am definitely not a “Sikhi Expert”.

What I do know is that myself and my family are constantly striving to be better people. Being a Sikh really is a huge part of our every day life. You can’t judge that by whether or not we do or do not do XYZ. I know many Sikhs who don’t outwardly look like Sikhs…but are such spiritual people and have way more of a connection to the Guru than other “turbaned” Sikhs that I know.

I don’t think it is about whether or not you “follow all the rules”. Guru Nanak questioned so many rituals and practices that were happening in his times. These days it seems like many are going down the path of losing touch with the meaning of things, and the practices are becoming rituals. God gave us all the gift of a brain and great intelligence to think for ourselves. Life is not Black and White. Being a Sikh is not about following the “rule book”. I get so frustrated at times when I hear people scolding others for not “following the rules”. It’s not to say that we shouldn’t have guidelines and structure. That is needed. It is just that many get so locked into things as “right and wrong” and judge others based on that. There also becomes a narrow minded approach and NOT tuning into their high consciousness to make decisions for themselves.

I think we should be focused on supporting each other no matter what our level of practice (of Sikhi is) rather than focusing on the negative which discourages people. The more support we give, the more a person can grow in their spiritual practice.

Being a Sikh is a challenge. It takes discipline. It’s a daily practice. I feel that some level of daily practice is better than trying to do more than you can sustain and then stopping. My wife did take Amrit and she is a VERY devoted and spiritual woman. I don’t think it is fair to her or to me to be critical of things. We do our best to support, ENCOURAGE and INSPIRE each other when needed. Someone’s spiritual practice is between them and their Guru. No one has the right to criticize someone else. Think what you want. Everyone is entitled to their opinion. I just feel that without knowing the full picture of someone and their life, critical remarks can only be from a very narrow view of someone’s life. We are much better off to give support and encouragement so that they might be a better person.

Why do I put my life up on the internet? Well, I hope that people will see other perspectives and be inspired to make changes in their own lives. The biggest problem I have seen in my experience with other Sikhs is what I so often mention as the “Black and white” perspective on life as a Sikh. The judgmental and critical way of doing things. Which divides and pushes people away. I want to see this change.

I have found that the key to changing something in my life is to be aware of the problem. Many of us do things without really thinking about it or being aware of what we are doing. Then when someone brings it to your attention you may start catching yourself doing that thing. With that awareness you can then make a change and stop doing that thing, or do it differently.

I’m sure I’ll write more about all this in the future, but I just wanted to post some thoughts. I hope people will be a little more open and realize that we are all on this journey of life together. The more we share and support each other, the easier that journey will be. Myself and my wife may not fit the mold of what all people think as a true Gursikh, but I don’t think it matters what others think. We will go on doing what we do, which we do for ourself and not to prove something to someone else.

I appreciate all the love and support from so many of you, which has been overwhelming. It serves as fuel, motivates me to become a better person, and work more on my spiritual practice as a Sikh. This I hope will then grow my ability to share Guruji’s light with others who are in need.

Sat Nam!

30 Responses to “My Life and Family on This Blog”

  1. Turbo says:

    Gurmustuk Singh Ji,

    your blog is very interesting, often illuminating and inspiring, and full of wonderful pictures, and I for one won’t complain if you continue posting!

    Criticism can in the first instance be upsetting, but if we discover that the criticism is unfounded, based on ignorance, or simply out of spite, then it becomes apparant that those criticising need to look within themselves.

    However we may also receive constructive criticism, and this should be welcomed. Obviously the language used in the criticism can make all the difference – as you say, even while offering criticism the aim should be to help and support each other.

    I’m not sure if this is relevant here, but Kabir has written a very interesting shabad which starts ‘Nindo nindo moko log nindo’ (forgive my grammar).

    Perhaps somebody with more knowledge might expand on this.

    Stay in Chardi Kala

  2. Anonymous says:

    i can understand your anxiety about this kind of criticism.it definitely hurts when its directly related to your very personal life.
    unfortunately this is the price one has to pay if one exposes personal life like that on the internet.if you look at other blogs,they are full of nasty comments.but its very courageous of you to be doing this.it requires just one person to poison the whole thing and in anonymity of internet everyone becomes BOLD.you can control who can publish comments on the blog if you are bothered by all this bickering but anyhow keep the good work

  3. Anonymous says:

    I have to add here that your blog has been very inspiring and the many pictures and mini video clips shared of your everyday life, and also of other fellow GurSikhs, has just showed me, a fellow youth, that Sikhi doesn’t mean a discontinuation in one’s life. Gurmustuk Singh Ji, i just have one thing to say to people who have such criticisms. Well who really died here and made anyone of us god? Isnt an individuals’ r’ship with Guruji or God in general, something personal, and if need be, we will be punishable for our actions by the superior being himself? Isnt that what being human, or more specifically, sikh, all about? Aren’t we all learners who keep on striving to learn and try to educate others to the best of our abilities, each and every day? Rather than place ourselves on some platform which we apparently think is higher than another’s, and then we start on telling other’s how to lead their lives. Or in the conext of Sikhi, that the way they do certain things are wrong and such. Just do remember, we all learn from mistakes, that is if what we do are even mistakes to begin with. Just gotta say that if only everyone cld follow the motto “live & let live”, trust me, ppl, and more importantly so, many youth wouldn’t even struggle with the concept of religion in the first place.

  4. Tarun Singh says:

    I think the job of the responses to the bhangra posts should have been more informative than personally attacking, by no means do I think that bhangra makes you a bad sikh or not doing bhangra makes you a good sikh, but it was just whether it is reasonable to do so after langar was served in the same hall, but that’s beside today’s post. Your website is one that is inspiring to tell you the truth, it makes me want to be a part of Espanola’s sikh community, you have done a tremendous seva to the sikh community through this site and sikhnet.com, and may vaheguru continue to give you the courage and strength to help more manmukhs like myself.
    Bhul Chuk Maaf Karni

  5. Vicky Singh says:

    Gurmustuk Singh, I know exactly what you are saying. Some people are in habit of act like a supreme court judge and pass the judgment like they are god or something. Most important they don’t care whether their statement gonna hurt other person sentiment or not.

    There are lots of people who simply don’t know how to mind their own business. Particularly today’s youth they have problem of NOT living in peace with other sikh friends. For the god sake, we shouldn’t hate or criticize each other just because of little difference in our nature.

    All you can do is ignore these ppls, and more good is to Turn off the “Anonymous� status in the comment replies. And another idea that I can give you is to consider to remove the blog section from sikhnet homepage (this will protect your personal stuff from thousands of unwanted visitors/commenters who only know how to talk negative).

    Keep up your spirit high & Stay in Chardi kala !!

    Regards
    Vicky Singh

  6. Anonymous says:

    Just wanted to add to the comments that I enjoy reading your blog; it’s inspirational and you’re most courageous to share so much of yourself and your family. I hope you don’t become too discouraged by negative comments. BTW, the Bat Mitvah pictures were great; perhaps you can share more about the Bat Mitvah itself? Think you’re definitely on track about learning about other religions (and boy you do have a multi-religious family! Interesting that your mother and cousin were both drawn to Indian faiths). It’s great that you’re so strong in your faith and you and your wife are providing such a good spiritual foundation for your son – there are so many children today who lack any sort of spiritual direction, unfortunately.

    Anyway, sorry that you’ve gotten some negative comments (and yes, I left a few criticisms on your marriage pose but they were meant to be constructive criticisms and were fairly minor anyway); I hope that you do continue posting to your blog and sharing your spirituality with others. Thank you!

  7. Anonymous says:

    Sir, i think that you are you are right. i have heard on Sikhnet that if you are a Sikh you should believe in only Sikhism and not other reigions, but looking at the blog it is not true especially if your loved ones are from diffrent religions,. that shouldnt mean you dont believe them. It is a really gr8 thing about inter faith! if there is an History fair at my school i should do it on interfaith. Thank you for inspiring us and me! Sukhmani

  8. Anonymous says:

    Gurmustuk Singh Bro,

    Remember not everyone who posts on your blog is a Sikh. Some are from other religions jealous off our faith and our people. They post negative comments to divide us. But we are one…where ever there is a Sikh no matter wot race or nationality. He/she is my brother/sister.

    GurFateh

  9. Anonymous says:

    http://www.zaman.com/?bl=hotnews&alt=&trh=20050710&hn=21561

    Just like to draw attention that some Sikhs are being targetted by racists who think they are Muslims due to terrorist attacks on London.

    Please leave a report incident link on main page of sikhnet.com

    Gurfateh.

  10. Anonymous says:

    Great Blog

    you have a truly inspiring jeevan

    WJFK WJKF

  11. Anonymous says:

    Gurumustuk-
    Your blog and the Sikhnet website are a great inspiration to anyone wishing to lead a Sikhi life in USA or elsewhere.
    I hope you will not be discouraged by some narrowminded people who have written nasty comments.
    Please keep up the good work.

    - Regular reader

  12. Anonymous says:

    Gurmustuk Singh bro,

    I strongly suggest you make this blog users only…as it is open to abuse by non-sikhs.

    I have to laugh and have pitty for these non-sikh posters who have such jealously in their hearts because we have such an open and beautiful religion. LOL

    Chardi Kala

  13. Turbo says:

    I managed to find the shabad by Kabir I mentioned earlier:

    ninda-o ninda-o mo ka-o log ninda-o.
    Slander me, slander me – go ahead, people, and slander me.
    nindaa jan ka-o kharee pi-aaree.
    Slander is pleasing to the Lord’s humble servant.
    nindaa baap nindaa mehtaaree. ||1|| rahaa-o.
    Slander is my father, slander is my mother. ||1||Pause||
    nindaa ho-ay ta baikunth jaa-ee-ai.
    If I am slandered, I go to heaven;
    naam padaarath maneh basaa-ee-ai.
    the wealth of the Naam, the Name of the Lord, abides within my mind.
    ridai suDh ja-o nindaa ho-ay.
    If my heart is pure, and I am slandered,
    hamray kapray nindak Dho-ay. ||1||
    then the slanderer washes my clothes. ||1||
    nindaa karai so hamraa meet.
    One who slanders me is my friend;
    nindak maahi hamaaraa cheet.
    the slanderer is in my thoughts.
    nindak so jo nindaa horai.
    The slanderer is the one who prevents me from being slandered.
    hamraa jeevan nindak lorai. ||2||
    The slanderer wishes me long life. ||2||
    nindaa hamree paraym pi-aar.
    I have love and affection for the slanderer.
    nindaa hamraa karai uDhaar.
    Slander is my salvation.
    jan kabeer ka-o nindaa saar.
    Slander is the best thing for servant Kabeer.
    nindak doobaa ham utray paar. ||3||20||71||
    The slanderer is drowned, while I am carried across. ||3||20||71||

  14. Hi
    Gurumustuk ji

    i have personally been inspired by your blog. I visit everyday without fail.Because of You i have started my own blog i have started to take meditation and Yoga . You may not know it but you may have indirectly inspired someone and made im a better person. People who criticise are many you cant stop them. Dont Worry. What greater sewa is there that through some way ( your blog) that you may have change someones life expose them to the sikhi way of life. You are the Lighthouse in this age of Aquarious.

    Dont Worry let guruji take care of this people

    Keep on going

    Waheguru ji ka Khalsa
    Waheguru ji ki Fateh

  15. Kiran says:

    Sat Sri Akal Sri,
    Your blog is very unique and it pulled me more towards Sikhism. I’m born in a Sikh family, but I never praticed the religion. And, now reading your blog i’m so inspired and i feel so bad that i wasted half my life without remembering God. You opened my eyes that other people who convert into Sikhism pratice the religion better than the ones who are born into the Sikh family. Thanks for your support. One time in life i drank amrit (baptized), but it was my bad luck that after three years i gave up. I even named my children English names so they could fit in the English society. But, with God’s grace i came along your blog and i’m so impressed that i’m on the right track now. I now changed my children’s name to their orginal Punjabi names. And, started to teach them how to pray and about Sikhism. I just needed someone to guide me and that was you. Thanks again.

  16. I don’t know bout anti-sikh plots.. but I do know how you feel. It makes me sad that many sikhs seem to separate themselves from other sikhs because of the way they practice. Can’t we all just get along? Anyways…
    Be strong dear brother in divine!

  17. Anonymous says:

    You have Guruji blessings; a fantastic family; an inspiring Blog; and a wonderful extended family that are so varied but so supportive of each other. It takes a strong person to do what you are doing – your message helps many young Sikhs – so please carry on and ignore comments made by people who are not in chardikala. Guru Nanak’s message is a message of love for God and God’s people. You are spreading this message so please don’t hesitate from doing this wonderful service to our community. Hari Singh

  18. Anonymous says:

    I’m gonna be a bit conterversial and say that I believe the 10th master of Sikhism (Guru Gobind Singh Ji) didnt want to impose the 5k’s on all people who wanted to follow the Sikh faith. The Guru formed the Warrior-Saints (Khalsa) to fight the enemy’s of the time who where the tyrannical Islamic invaders (afghans, persians, moghuls).

    Sikhism of Guru Nanak is one of learning about God and mysticism, disregarding rituals. The 10th Guru created the Khalsa to protect and defend the Sikh’s aswell as others from injustice.

    I believe modern day Sikh leaders are wrong when they say if you are not baptised or “turbanned” you are not Sikh. I believe everyone and anyone can be Sikh but to be a Khalsa then you have to have the 5 k’s and be ready to defend the faith, the innocent and the oppressed to the death.

    Too many people get baptised too early into the Khalsa when they havent even developed spirtually inside first. This is what is missing in most “turbanned Sikhs” these days. I believe they need to really earn the baptism by showing they are balanced both spiritually and physically.

    Bhul Chuk Maaf Karni

    …forgive me if I’ve said anything wrong.

    Regards

  19. Anonymous says:

    Friends,
    I guess some people have forgotten that sikh means a student. As long as you’re a student you can’t be perfect, you have to reach the spiritual level of a Guru to be perfect sikh. Just ignore these people and continue to strive for perfection, the Guru and then ParmAtma. That’s all

  20. Billoo says:

    I like to eat bagels.

  21. singh says:

    Congratulations

  22. Anonymous says:

    dearest gsk ji. i hope n feel that u being a pure n true follower of sikhism i.e the one who has understood the essence n not the outer should not get affected by some who only believe wat they have been believing n think that only to be the truth ,n do not want to practise wat our gurus told us to do inthe G.G .S only want to look like a khalsa but not do anythin practical abt it n wen any one else shows them the real light tho thei inner knows it to be the truth they cannot follow so the one who followsis always criticised but our gurus must be laughing at wat many of us hav made of their teachings so god is great n u have been blessed n so r we who get a chance to read
    really proud of u n lucky to have u as guide in the true sense
    lots of love n to u n ur diverse family
    proud to be a reader of ur blog
    raji singh,auckland
    if u shall write bac even a line i would be honoured

  23. Anonymous says:

    Hi Gurmustuk Singh,

    I have been following your trip East with great interest. You have a wonderful extended family and I for one appreciate being invited in for a “visit”.

    You know, you never can please everybody, but just know there are plenty of people out here in internet land who are following your day by day story with great anticipation.

    Thanks and Sat Nam

  24. hk bedi says:

    Gurumustak singh ji,
    your blog is becoming very interesting.we started coming to know about you and your family and seems like ending up somewhere else.so all of us..we have to stop right here.THIS IT.(FULL STOP).no more comments on any one now.get on to the message gurumustak singh is trying to convey to all of us.
    Turbo, who gave the meaning of Kabir’s dohey Good Job… really great, this is what exactly it means Gurumustak.
    and uk singh ji about you… you are going really too far in using your language words.pls use neat language.thanx.

  25. GURMIT K AUR says:

    Cngratulations to Kiran.
    ‘charan saran guru ek penda jae chal satguru kote penda agae hoe lathe hain’[ when u take one step towards Guru, He takes million steps towards you says Bhai Gurdaas Ji)

  26. desified says:

    waheguru ji ka khalsa
    waheguru ji ki fateh

    GSK, Although we have never met or spoken, I feel I know enough about your character through your blog to know that you will not allow any critcism to deflate you but will use it to build stronger and even more tolerant character.

    This is yet another test that I know you will pass with flying colours.

    For every one who critices your blong there are several who praise it.

    Please keep up the good work.

    Wahegurus blessing is with you.
    Chardi kala , hamesha

  27. Anonymous says:

    alright, im going to be the first to criticize Gurumustuk Veer Ji

    And he deserves it…
    How is it that you are in New York, wait make that Brooklyn NY, and cant say a word to your new friend Mandeep Singh. (we hung out at solstice, just in case you forgot)
    Whats up kid? I dont know if you know how to get in contact with me, and it kinda smells that you are leaving tommorow.
    I called sat jagat, and siri sevak to try and get your parents number. but only answering machines would hear my pleas.
    theres still time yet, im gonna search more and track you down.

    hope i talk to you soon singh, really miss you right now
    waheguru ang sang

  28. Jaspal says:

    Shame on you. you know who you are.

    Gurumustuk Ji, I feel that there is no need for you to justify yourself to these shameful people.

    But good on you for doing so.

    May Waheguru bless you and your family.

    Satnam Waheguru Waheguru Waheguru

  29. ann says:

    gosh, ummmm i know i’m going against the grain here and this topic is kinda old. and i really don’t want this to be a discussion thread blog.

    BUT

    i think it’s silly for “us” to fight with eachother.

    i like gurumustak. he’s doing some great things and i wish he wasn’t alone (but it’s okay because’s we call a gursikh “faujan” “an army of one”) and he is an army of one.
    AND
    the person’s post that brought up the whole head covering issue was a legitimate post. please don’t just follow like a herd of sheep. have something constructive to say other than to keep using cliches and quotes. it’s not good to shunn your brother/sister just because they don’t think like you. because you know what we need everyone we’ve got and then some to battle the corrupt…we don’t have a billion or 2 billion that we can just ostersize because they follow the religion to the letter. we need more strong people like that. and i thank that person(i’m sorry if you’re not a woman) and i thank Gurumustak for bringing us sikhnet and this blog. i just wish that person hadn’t said anything…i don’t like negativity!

    i have nothing but good things to say about gurumustak and arjan and narayan (the cutie pie!).

    this is a great, great, great blog! everyone and i mean everyone who’s on here and sees this blog is in love with this blog because it’s soooooooo deep. it can act as a bridge that we’ve craved for so long (between east and west).i love it. actually gurumustak, this is taking time that i spend away from sikhnet :). btw, did you guys change the discussions look from a week ago cuz i can’t find a particular thread.

    have to go my little one’s crying!
    -ann (if you really want my email address, just ask)

  30. sat sri akal i must appriciate you and your family for devoting them to holy spirit of sikhism.no body is perfect and a sikh is chela(student)even guruji called himself to be disciple of gurugranth sahib.so we all are learning till end of the circle.keep up the good work and god bless you.jaswinder from germany.